Glowing exit sign
" I think a lot about killing myself.
Not like a point on a map, bur rather like a glowing exit sign at a show that's never been quite bad enough to make me want to leave.
See, when I'm up I don't kill myself because, holy shit, there's so much left to do. 
When I'm down I don't kill myself because then the sadness would be over, and the sadness is my old paint under the new, the sadness is the house fire or the broken shoulder.
I'd still be me without it, but I'd be so boring. "
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